Awash in the sea of Humanity
I promised myself I wouldn’t.
I told people. It was over, I had over come.
For some reason, my eyes opened up at 4:20 am, and I was ready to shop!
WHAT THE HECK!?!?!
So, I participated in the day after holiday of Black Friday.
This involved me and my mother (who I just barely got over walking in front of to make sure she doesn’t embarrass me *Hi Mom!*) walking amongst the throngs of people who were fighting hand and tooth to get at what they wanted. I witnessed people with so much *stuff* that they were kicking piles of stuff as the line moved.
And then I got one thing and paid for it and was gone. Oh the sweet, sweet Irony.
We then wandered over to Target where people were running to get in line. Later on, I was laughing as people were pushing each other out of the way in the effort to find that one “super” deal.
Eventually I found my mom in line (after I was finished getting scowled at as I was laughing) and we started towards the check out. At this point I will liken this trip to those of the 49rs, or other great people who had a pilgrimage. It seemed to be that as we moved closer and closer more pieces of clothing and toys (we found a PSP and a karaoke machine) being disguarded as people slogged their way to the check out. Some were bound to be running out of food and water, others, freezing to the ground as they walked across the plains… Wait.. Strike that, I automatically went into Pioneer day mode, sorry. So, as I disguarded my tool chest that I found I didn’t need, I made my way to the forefront and paid for my stuff. Two DVDs.
I mean, I like collecting stuff as much as the next guy, but for the most part, mine weigh 300lbs and make all kinds of clattery sounds and blinky lights.
Insane.
I am glad I was at home, snug in my bed while this madness was going on.
sniff, i was rudely awakened when you came in. but i am glad you got hairspray, so i could watch it!!!!! 😛
It’s the internal desire to shop with Brendo that you have which caused this. I too went to Target at 6:00 Eastern, which would have been right before you woke up. We did not want to get there until it opened, so we were right outside the doors when it opened. Talk about crazies. We were yelled at by crazy ladies who had been out in the freezing weather for hours before the store opened.
“We’ve been here since 4:00, @#$^#@^$ @#$@#$&^#$& GO TO THE BACK OF THE LINE”.
Um excuse me psycho lady who waits for hours in the frigid Ohio Winter air just so you can be a grump and try to run over the crazy lady in front of you as you race through the store for those (8) $3.99 copies of ‘Message in a Bottle’ or whatever chick flick you thought would be nice to give away to your family for Christmas. You’re not fooling anyone. They know you’re cheap and that they only cost you $4. I mean come on.
I wasn’t going to cut in line. I wanted to see the freak show go in before I walked it. Afterall, most of my shopping was already done via the internet the day before. Who did I yell at? Nobody. Did I freeze? No way. How did I show my Christmas spirit? By not swearing at the top of my lungs at my fellow peeps. That’s right, I can calmly and collectively say that Christmas is not about Kevin Costner it’s about Christ. Show the love, not the lungs. Save that for your kids when they find out you didn’t get them a Wii because they were all sold out by the time you left the DVD rack with your 57 videos. Yell at them and tell them to be grateful they can sit down and watch Serendipity as a family now in WideScreen. If they’re grateful children, they’ll cherish every minute. If they are like you, you’ll need those lungs. As I told you at Target. Merry Christmas.